Sadly, my 2-1/2 month journey across Africa is coming to a close in just a few days, but Africa left its mark on me. Yes, I’ve fallen in love with this amazing continent and it’s warm people, but let’s talk about what wonderful ailments I’ve encountered since I’ve been over here. Please note, that most have been self-inflicted. And while I have suffered once from traveler’s stomach in a large city of all places, it was easily cured in a few hours from over-the-counter meds. Happy to report that the Malaria Meds (Malarone) and Yellow Fever shot have lived up to their expensive promises. I don’t believe there are meds for most of the incidents I’ve encountered.  As my close friends and family can tell you, I’ve always been slightly accident prone and Africa figured it out pretty quickly…

1) Hot Water Bottle, Nairobi, Kenya:  Yes, I have never slept with one before. They are wonderful. After two days of flying to Kenya, I was thrilled to snuggle up in the warm sheets. Even though I was in pj’s, I must have rolled on top of the water bottle in my sleep, only to wake up to a red, raw, sunburn looking imprint of the water bottle on my back.  Thanks to the lovely Spa Manager at Saurni Samburu and her magical aloe, the bottle has almost completely faded.

2)  Nairobi Fly, Laikipia Kenya: Unfortunately, this bug looks completely harmless. I am not a big fan of bugs, so when I encountered a nest of them, I proceeded to go into Rambo style combat with a bottle of Doom on them and sleep with a towel over my head. Well…one climbed on the inside of my left arm in my sleep and I must have smushed him. Well done you say? No. Those buggers are full of acid and until it’s dried the acid spreads to any skin that it comes in contact with. Afterwards it leaves a nice red blister that flakes off…let’s just say that my left arm pit took almost a month to heal. In retrospect, I suggest calling the hotel manager for unidentified bug species.

3) Blister Beetle, South Africa: Just as my left arm pit was healing, a bug managed to climb onto my neck at a Brai (outdoor BBQ African style). While I thought I squashed him on my neck, this creature managed to crawl down my right armpit and into my sports bra. This son-of-a-gun left a trail of blister from the neck, down the right arm pit and across the bra line.  Blister beetles I discovered actually leave very similar marks to the Nairobi flies– they just don’t spread. I’ve been keeping airport pharmacies in business with over-the-counter cream purchases.

4) Bloody knees and palms, Lusaka, Zambia: What could be more embarrassing than being the last passenger for a flight? You know the one…that holds up take-off? So here comes the American, bags flailing, sprinting, sweating across the runway to the plane.  I see all the passengers on the right side of the plane with their faces pressed on the windows, looking at me. So of course, I trip. Over what? Nothing of course. I managed to catch myself and when I looked up to smile meekly at the passengers staring back at me, my backpack smacks me in the back of my head sending me on my knees and palms to hit the runway. Even worse, was the fake sympathy I received from other passengers when I finally boarded the flight.

5) A case of fat wrist, Arusha, Tanzania: Only I could develop a sore and swelling wrist the day before I leave to hike Kilimanjaro, the highest free-standing mountain in the world (19,340 vertical feet to the summit).   While people speculated between spider bites and a broken bone, I secretly know how it happened.  At the Dar es Salaam airport (I don’t suggest going there if you don’t have to), I had a long layover before my flight to Arusha. I found a little restaurant called the Pink Flamingo (definitely don’t go there) on the second floor. A porter appeared out of no where to help me with my climbing bag. I’ve been lugging this thing across Africa, why now would I pay someone to carry it?  Well a week later, my wrist is fat as ever from a sprain, but it didn’t keep me from climbing a mountain, so I’ll just have to go to the doc when I am back stateside for a splint.

Climbing the Lava Tower, Kilimanjaro, Tanzania.

There are certainly real ailments to prepare for in Africa, so read up before you go. If something happens, there are great medical organizations like the Flying Doctors that are always there to help in an emergency situation.  Other than touring their facilities, I’ve been lucky to not experience their services first hand– though hotel owners and tour operators alike swear by them. Now if only I could protect me from myself.